Friday, October 25, 2013

Journal Snippet: Figurine in Space

Most people on this planet are sculptures of moldable clay. But not me.
I am a lovely figurine, already formed, hardened, and polished.

This might sound like a good thing, but it can be a difficult state. Although I have talent and beauty, I am lacking the communication skills and flexibility needed to live amongst these creatures who differ from me... I may even have to abandon pieces of my unique self to make room for earth-features. In order for me to alter any details, I must be melted down and reformed. This nightmarish process in my life is called "change," and it's scary to me. Change means brainfog every day and anxiety attacks at night. Change means losing myself for a period of time.

I want more friends, but that means I have to get to know new people. Every new friend I make is likely to see me in a partially melted state: unstable, uncertain, and not quite as beautiful as I can be. I am only safe in my solid state, when a more static routine is in place.

But I'm going to dive right in. I'm tired of hiding in my safe but lonely bubble. Looking out into the atmosphere of Earth, I will venture into a world where I may be unable to breathe the air. Let's hope I have enough oxygen to last for a long time.

"Figurine in Space" art by me

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