Saturday, February 13, 2016

Aspies in Love - Alyssa and Matt (A Neurodiverse Valentine's Day)

This video is my public declaration that says "Hey, this love pug is mine and I wanna show him off."... Even though I'm sorta shy about it. xD It's also to show that everyone is lovable. You just need the right kind of person. 

Have an awesome Valentine's Day! Now go enjoy it with yourself, your spouse, your boyfriend/girlfriend, your crush, or your postage stamp collection because that's how you roll.

Peace ✌

Music by: Kevin MacLeod and Purple Planet
Animated characters by Buddypoke app
Various stock clips from



This is me.
And this Matt.
Both of us are on the autism spectrum.
And... both of us are in love.

You might be thinking, people with autism can't be romantic!
*BEEP (incorrect)*
Misconception alert!
Many people with autism and Asperger's Syndrome do fall in love, get married, and start a family. Whether that's family of kids or cats.

But, due to differences in social/emotional development, some of us are late bloomers, or grow up never wanting a relationship at all. I was one of the late bloomers.

When I was younger, I decided that love was icky.
(funny voice) "I'm never getting married!" I said.

When I was younger, I decided that love was icky.
(funny voice) "I'm never getting married!" I said.

Here is how we met. I was kinda stalking through the members of an Asperger's Facebook group looking for new friends when I came across Matt's profile. His profile didn't quite fit the criteria of what I considered "interesting" (and I was picky about who I chose to talk to at the time... I tended to avoid incomplete or strange profiles).

I messaged him anyway. Why? I don't know. In retrospect, I say it's divine providence.

We talked for a while, and me, being an overly suspicious and analytical aspie, found him creepy at first because he was so dang friendly and considerate. I was not used to that. But eventually I adjusted and started to like his character.

Time passed, and we talked almost every day, about pretty much everything. We started Skyping, too.

He was a very interesting person. So I invited him to participate in my documentary, "Through Our Eyes: Living with Asperger's."

He lived in Ohio, and I was in Illinois, so he drove over here so I could interview him. Plus we wanted to meet in person anyway, so I had my friend drive me to where he was staying.

That was my first time in a Jeep, by the way.

Oh, and here's me meeting Matt.

We did lots of stuff.
Filming the documentary...
Going to Chicago...
Walking... walking... more walking....
And being weird.
Matt also took me on a date.

Over time, I realized how valuable our friendship was. It's like he's the same species as me so we understand each other, and we accept each other's weirdness. Well, more than accept it. We love it.

The next time we met up was at a conference for showing my documentary.

We saw each other again in June, only this time I visited him in Ohio.

He took me for a ride on his 4-wheeler. I don't have any footage from it so here's my brother on the 4-wheeler.

And obviously, we had our silly moments.

I wanted to remember that visit, and all the visits in the future. So I filmed the house where we stayed--for me, remembering places helps me remember important memories.

Our most recent visit was after Christmas. I didn't overplan this time because I wanted us to really enjoy our time together. It'd be hard to if we were burned out. I wanted us to enjoy what we both do best... just living every day, cooking food, chilling out, and working together.

Dear Matt,
Thank you for not only accepting me, but for loving me. Thank you for choosing me not out of charity, but for who I am.

Thank you for being so sweet to me...
Sending me funny pictures and videos to cheer me up...
Writing on my screen during all nighters...
And leaving rants in my inbox.

You are incredibly smart...
And funny.

I also think it's cute how we have the same shoe size.

Thank you for all the deep conversations about life, aspies, society, and the future. And all those random facts we like obsessing over.

Thank you for going with my flow instead of going against it.
For showing me that I am not defective, and that you value my needs, my hopes, and my dreams. And for letting me into your life to do the same.

Thank you for giving me hope for a real future, with the one man who is perfectly compatible with me in every way. I thank God every day for all his ridiculously obvious hints that you are the one. I wouldn't have noticed otherwise.

There is so much more to our relationship that I wish I could convey, but you know me. I'm shy, people are watching me, and I can't find the right words sometimes. So... that's it.

But one more thing...

You are my sunshine, my muffin, and my viking bodyguard.
The question is... will you be my Valentine?

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